The uncomfortable truth why pretty girls can only trust pretty girls

This is how you miss opportunities and connections with people who are actually on your level.

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Last month, we talked about “shrinking” to fit in—and how it’s self-sabotaging.

Today, I want to dissect why you feel the need to shrink.

Because you stand out.

It’s something most people aren’t suave enough to hide.

They swallow. They maintain eye contact, but their eyes reveal what’s beneath the surface.

They feel attracted, intimidated, and curious about you at the same time.

Everyone keeps asking you questions without offering anything about themselves in return.

Sometimes they have bad intentions. Sometimes they don’t—because envy is immediate, but not something we can process right away.

Sometimes they are genuinely good people. They’re subconsciously struggling to suppress involuntary envy, and it manifests as prying.

Trust your instincts.

If you feel uncomfortable, don’t answer as if you’re obliged to. Change the subject. Keep things vague.

You feel like shrinking because that’s what happened to you every time in social settings when you are just being yourself. You’re the light and a city on a hill that cannot be hidden.

You’re tired of questions you don’t want to answer. Sometimes they’re so specific and private that you wouldn’t even ask them yourself. So to avoid this, you shrink. You act smaller, more casual, more “down to earth.” You lower yourself to their level so they’ll leave you alone.

If that’s what you believe, you’ve fallen into a trap.